Why I run?

I am addicted, I just love my trails…

It’s not about where you work or what you do. It’s not about where you’ve been or where you wanna go. It’s about your passion…right….now. What are you most passionate about today. What moves you. What gets you out of bed tomorrow morning, what shapes your identity for today.

Nice words and all of them true. I wake up thinking I feel like a runner, I try to feel it with every step I take. I take the stairs, I park the car far form the door, I take the bus stop before the one I have to go out, I go walking during my breaks, I run every other day, I do exercises when the family is in bed every evening, I make my own granola, I stopped taking sugar, I exchanged the 8+ cups of coffee a day for three of them and have now my tea moments…

Be better than yesterday

And yet I feel like I fail. It’s never enough, I can always do better. I can always go to bed sooner, rest more, not drink that beer, not take those salted almonds, not take that chocolate, do 5 minutes more of exercise, run longer, run faster.. It’s never enough. And I am so happy with that. Every day I wake up with the possibility to improve myself, to be better than yesterday. Everyday I can beat myself and feel the moment of victory that I defeated my inner demons. It’s that drive that keeps me going, It’s that effort that I like so much. It’s keeps me pushing my limits, And I am a very good opponent, I’m hard to defeat. It’s the lack of a stop that makes me this way. I always wanna win. I can’t help it; when I see a competition element I… I just wanna beat myself. It’s an addictive way of thinking. Just as addictive I guess as smoking or drugs can be.

I just love my trails

But I exchanged it all for running. For being me, alone in the woods, the mountains, the valleys. When it’s me and nature: I fly. I am at ease, my mind gets in a state where it is controlled only by the pounding of my feet and the turnings of my body. I soak up the feeling of freedom, and when descending the hills I feel weightless both physically and mentally. I can be anything I want. But most of all I am one with my surroundings, I am there at that moment and nowhere else, I live for that moment and nothing will take away that feeling. I just love my trails…